Monthly Archives: January 2017

The Crazy Shit List

I think you all know by now that I adore Tim Ferriss.  The man can do no wrong, in my eyes.  I find him tremendously smart, and I love his interviews with awesome people.  I say without reservation that becoming a Ferriss fangirl has changed my life for the better.  If you are not listening to his podcast, you should be.  And even if you aren’t big on improvement – if you’re a human, you should be big on improvement, by the way – you can probably at least appreciate his year-end wrap-up.  He gives some really great ideas for objectively evaluating your life in the previous year.  I will link the podcast at the bottom of his post.

Two things he does that I have done, one of which I know that a certain Tokyo Dave has already done, too: calendar evaluation and the “crazy shit” list.  I’ll let you listen to the podcast for the calendar eval, but the crazy shit list is basically a list of random shit that seems totally crazy that you could, hypothetically, do.  Or not.  Give yourself a time limit.  Or not.  Write out a list of crazy shit.  You want to read some crazy shit?  Here’s my list.

  1. Sell the house or not and move to Florida or somewhere else warm with palm trees.
  2. Invite Tom Woods on the podcast I don’t have.
  3. Talk to as many “out of my league” hot dudes as humanly possible.  See what happens.
  4. Get rid of 80% of all of my personal belongings.
  5. Slice my eye a la “Un Chien Andalou.”  (This is totally insane and makes far more sense if you listen to the podcast.  Or not.  It actually doesn’t make any sense, but I have been thinking about watching that movie for the last couple of days.)
  6. Get rid of my bed and sleep on the floor.
  7. Take the kids and disappear to South America.
  8. Sell my soul to Milhouse for $1.00.
  9. Buy and easel and start painting.
  10. Sign up for a marathon 3-5 months from now.
  11. Air my grievances.  LOUDLY.
  12. Protest the government in town square for all to see.  With a bullhorn.
  13. Tell awful people that I alternately hate and forgive them.
  14. Have the whole family start sleeping on the floor in “my” room and leave the other two former bedrooms for a playroom and an office.
  15. Stop washing my hair.  Permanently.
  16. Give my savings away, sell the house, buy an RV, and take off.

Taken separately from each other, they seem just weird and stupid and in the case of #5, downright freaky.  Trust me, that movie is downright freaky.  It was playing one night in the background at the Blue Fugue when I was in college.  I was kind of drunk, and it scarred me, predictably.  So naturally, I want to watch it again.

Anyway, you probably noticed there seem to be some themes of getting rid of shit and moving.  I could be wrong, but I think my brain might be in a purge mode.  I have been cleaning closets all day today, deciding what to keep, what to donate, and what can honestly just be thrown out.  The “donate” pile is the biggest so far, I’m happy to report, but I’m nowhere near done yet.  In fact… I think I’m going to keep on keeping on and remove stuff from the entire house.

I was talking with Dave about this.  Dave is my “idea” guy.  Dave is the kind of guy who has all manner of “crazy” ideas.  Or at least, they seem crazy until they turn out to be genius.  The basic gist of the conversation was this: Why do we limit ourselves based on fear?  Think of all of the opportunity you have missed because you were afraid, on some level.  Are we that scared what other people think?  Other people are mostly idiots, and they won’t remember the stupid shit you did 10 minutes from now, let alone 10 weeks, 10 months, or 10 years from now.  They really won’t.  People are too self-involved.  Hell, you probably won’t remember what crazy shit you did today in 10 months’ time!  So what are we all so scared of?!

For whatever reason, it made me think of that episode of Parks and Rec where Ron Swanson brings a pig to the park to kill and put on a spit.  He produces a permit that is simply a white piece of paper with the words, “I can do what I want,” laid out in type print.  And you know what?  You really can.

What is stopping me from firing up the ole libertarian blog, starting a podcast, and making some money that way?  Nothing.  Me.  Because I can’t get out of my own way.  What is keeping me from traveling more?  Limited funds and the fact that I work for “the man.”  Well, again, whose fault is that?  I could be working for myself, doing something I’m good at and don’t get bored with, doing some traveling, and giving the kiddos a real education.  Need a permit for “home” schooling?  No problem.  “I can do what I want.”

Will any of this ever happen?  Well, the blog will, for sure.  I can’t speak to the rest of it, but it could.  Well.  Not the Andalusian dog part, but the rest of it could happen.  Given the fact that I am predictably unpredictable and have a knack for drastically altering course at the 23rd hour and 57th minute, you could probably make the argument that it’s even likely.  It is one of my great strengths and perhaps my most fatal flaw that I can’t seem to be satisfied in the same place for longer than three years.  I enjoy having a home base, but I value freedom a lot more.

Anyway, I’ll be interested to see what winds up on Tokyo Dave’s crazy shit list.  It will probably be crazier than mine because he’s more creative that way.  I will also be interested to see if they are things that potentially carry the seed for something bigger or ultimately less strange than they appear on the surface, taken individually.

Also, for my own part, I would like to add that I’m really happy to report that the main issue that ended up on the calendar list as a major problem in 2016 has already been taken out of the 2017 equation.  I am, in fact, excited to see the differences this yields up over the course of the next year.  I think it is going to result in some interpersonal relationship improvements, and I am positive that it is going to result in more vacation time.

In light of this fact, I am starting to block out my vacation time now because, as you might imagine, vacation  and friend time topped my list for shit that I enjoyed in 2016, and I had no more than one or two actual vacation days for my own use last year.  I am actually going to sit down tonight and look at package trips to Jamaica.  I’m getting my passport renewed.  I am serious about this tropical reading vacation that consists of an adults-only resort, a palm tree, all-inclusive, all I-my-liver-cares-to-handle drinks, and one solid day of reading.  I don’t know if it’s actually going to happen, but I’m going to try.

I swear I am not getting paid to plug Tim Ferriss because, as I have said before, he doesn’t need my endorsement.  However, if you hate resolutions but nevertheless see the benefit in committing to self-betterment and honest evaluations of your life, give this episode a listen.  At 45 minutes, it clocks in short for a Ferriss podcast.  You can listen to that while you’re stuck in traffic, although honestly, I’d recommend setting aside some time and making notes while you listen.  I have never walked away without new tidbits from Tim.

Oh, and my mantra for the year is as follows: “Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes.  You are free.”  Jim Morrison.

Guten Rutsch to you all!

“What I Learned in 2016” – The Tim Ferriss Show